Dear Diary,

aww.. today woke up with tired arms.. muscle pain.. after all the carrying of the bulky stuffs from yesterday.. no energy to play dizi..

morning went to lao shi's house for lesson.. stressed man.. left 1 more week to go.. before competition..

i must persevere!! everyday practicing my dizi.. think my neighbours sure very sian one.. everyday hear the same songs again and again and again..lol =x

just tahan!!

tues is group competition.. but dunno y i'm not nervous for it at all..lol..

may everything go well on tues ba!

chengsan co let's jia you together ba!! we can do it!! let's aim for top 3!!

everyone pls cooperate and lets do our best shot on tues ba!!!!

May Buddha protect and bless us shun shun li li~!!

Also hope that Melissa, Raymond and Jackson will do well for their grading exams!

just went to Alvina's house to celebrate her 21st Birthday.. saw many long-time-no-see ppl like Jennifer, Maria, Eileen, Xiang Ying and Mdm Ruby Cheah with her 2 daughters..so cute!! lol.. Jennifer brought her really cool bf from Nigeria.. and they are so loving man.. aww... =))

Happy 21st Birthday, Alvina Jie~!


*sometimes I wonder.. how important am i to u?*

Dear Diary,

Had my SYCO re-audition today.. finally saw the rest of the ex-syco dizi peeps le.. Jonathan became so muscular..lol.. xiangle and tingkai also came back for audition.. finally.. but sadded.. cos pauline and casper not joining.. =(

couldnt imagine today got so many ppl came to audit for syco.. i think got around 5-7 new dizi ppl who came for audition.. plus the current members.. hh, bh, tk, ql, xl, j and myself.. *_*

I wonder how many ppl they are going to accept for dizi..

i got a feeling that i might not be staying on le..

cos' i messed up the audition..haix.. so sad..

Finally saw guo lao shi and lin lao shi today.. they look the same..lol..

but guolaoshi was quite strict for the audition..

actually went in not nervous de.. but cos' i played the wrong tempo..

maybe i'm used to playing fast tempo le.. cos my competition songs are all fast..

then suddenly need to switch to tempo 60.. not used..

then kena scolded.. cos' i'm already so-called the 'old bird' in syco le.. since 2004 till now..

but then my standard like still no improvement..

so scared..

i want to overcome my nervousness!!

next sunday..7 dec..

really wish everything will go on well~~

I wish you all the best and good luck for your grading exam tmr, RAYMOND!!

=D

I'm sure you WILL do well de!!!!!!!

GAMBATE~!!

i also need to jia you le...

Dear Diary,

haix.. i'm super stressed up!! syco audition, Chengsan group competition, dizi solo competition, vocal exam.. /.\

why can't i sing using head voice? how to shift to head voice??? >.<""

Dear Diary,

OH WTF.. I can't believe that I was almost cheated off by $200!! If i had nv kept on insisting that I didnt want to sign up their package so that they said till like they're Gods or something..reducing my package to $388 .... my $588 would have already flew off.. #^$$* Just saw their stupid advertisement.. saying now $388 for 10 sessions!! >.<""

BUT THEN ITS WITHOUT GST YET... AFTER GST WOULD BE MMOORREEE MMOONNEEYYY!!

That time say wad free facial by smsing.. ended up.. telling me..

"Dear, There's NO such thing as FREE in this world"

Stupid.. then why put up the stupid advertisement.. saying FREE??? And now their new advertisement they go and change story again..-.-""

Wanted to just go for a facial wash.. ended up signing up for their facial treatment package!!

Next time don't ever believe in those stupid advertisements le.. all bluff ppl one..

Cheaters.. blood suckers..

but good thing is.. actually its quite cheap le la..go once a month only $40+.. just hope their company wont close down within these 10 months.. but then hate their stupid marketing tricks!!!

Yesterday's visit to Zouk was FFUUNN!!

Its been some time since I drank so much.. =))

Yue and I saw a lot of A*G*S.. lol..

Thanks Hazel, For the invitation~!! =D

Dear Diary,

Dunno y.. i'm having weird and mixed feelings again..

How can I stop all these irritating feelings? >.<"

How I wish I could just stop thinking..stop dreaming.. stop running my mind wild.. stop pretending.. stop...

may everything be good tmr.. 8pm-9pm @ white tangerine cafe.. my turn..

Dear Diary,

Today went to see doc.. hopefully my gastric problem will get well soon ba.. i've been vomitting for the past 3 weeks le.. *_* The doc was really very nice and friendly.. 1st time encounter such a wonderful doc.. gave me a welcome card and also some leaflets about my conditions.. he also talked about my jaw prob.. though my purpose of seeing the doc was not about my jaw.. surprisingly, the doc also has jaw prob like me.. and he says he's coping with it too.. and sadly, there's no cure.. only thing we can do is to minimise the pain.. he even showed me some exercises =))

Of course, the bills was not very cheap too.. but worth the money! =)) You guys should go to Seng Kang de VariNice Kopitiam behind the Healthway Medical Group.. the doc rocks! =))

After that, went for my dizi lesson..

today argued with lao shi.. =x cos' of some scores clarification thingy.. but I also learned quite a lot of things from him.. hehehe...=)) Hong Lao Shi is the best!! =)) Just hope I'll do well for my competition.. I'll give my best shot.. now is hope that my gastric will heal fast.. dunwan anymore delay le.. cos it really affects my overall 'Qi'.. =( feel so tired and weak nowadays.. haix.. like having difficulty in breathing.. ugh..

after that, went for singing lesson.. haix.. I guess my expectation is really low.. but i'll give my best shot for coming sun's perf!! Joyce, pls have more emotion to the songs.. and express it out to show the audiences that you're telling them a story!!! Must make their hairs stand up!!! whahaha!!

My high notes are really bad.. hai.. must prac more le!!!!!

its so hard to control.. but i'll do my best! =')

Let's jia you together too, Regina and Raymond!!! =D

Dear Diary,

Today was my last day working at VivoCity de Best Denki as Panasonic promoter.. hmm.. so how's working there for the past 4 days..

all i can say is.. practically, everyone working there.. SMOKES!! >.<" and still got someone ask me wanna smoke or not.. yucks!! and then they thought im a smoker..

-.-""

do i look like one? I'm so innocent..lol.. =x

anyway, i think now i understand why Mei Hui doesnt want to quit her job.. cos' actually her commissions are already more than her basic salary!! I really pei fu her man.. browsed thru her previous records.. she one day can sell so many products.. for me leh.. my commissions got lesser each day.. =(

dunno is really no customers.. or i'm not convincing enough..

but good thing was.. i received a lot of compliments from the customers.. so far no complaints.. =))

the ppl there are nice.. except for a store uncle! >.<" practically everyone dislikes him.. from what I heard from another storeman.. but sometimes pity him also.. maybe he lacks of love?

anyway.. only 4 days la.. lol!

but received so many cuts on my hands.. cos of the warranty cards and new stocks made of sharp cardboards..-.-

today's such a scary day.. in the morning.. brought bee hoon to work to eat.. sat inside their eating room.. and guess wad.. while i was just beginning to enjoy my lovely breakfast.. I saw a cockroach on the table.. it crawled towards me and I blew it onto the floor.. quite disgusting already.. but i thought, "aiya.. nvm de la.. only 1.." and guess wad.. a few secs later.. another one pop out on the table! oh my!! I was totally shocked and disgusted!!

Its not about i'm afraid of them.. but it's so disgusting.. the room is so dirty and unhygienic..!!!

Then nvm.. i moved to another table opposite it.. and guess wad.. this time.. another black colour de cockroach crawled on the table! ARGH!! so pissed.. totally ruined my appetite.. i was wondering whether some other cockroach crawled inside my bag or something..

hai.. didnt want to continue eating.. despite having more than half of the bee hoon left.. i threw away the whole packet.. and went down to B1 to eat Kaya toast -.-

wad a disgusting encounter!! >.<"

The sweeper still tell me.. "..must get used to it.. no choice la.."

wth!

He should do something about it.. if not the company employ him for wad?!!

weird aye..

after work, I got another scary encounter.. was on my way to Mel's house.. and scarly out of nowwhere.. a bull dog barked at me.. and it was so dark till i couldnt see it! It hid behind the bush..-.-

after that.. walking down the pavement.. a cyclist almost knocked into me!!!

gave me such a big fright!! -.-

that's the end of my encounters.. luckily no more liao.. phew~

anyway.. hai. now more scary than the other encounters!

just now i opened my letter box.. and received SYCO re-audition letter and NAC.. guess wad!!

***SUPER IMPORTANT DATES TO REMEMBER***

1) My SYCO audition is on 25 NOVEMBER 620pm!! that's the same date as Mel's dizi exam and Ray's erhu exam!! so qiao..

2) And then my dizi solo competition is on 7 DECEMBER 415pm @ Esplanade Recital Studio! I'm no 3 out of 7 ppl.. do come down to support wor.. its on a sunday! =D

3) Chengsan group competition is on 2 DECEMBER 2pm @ Yong Siew Toh Conservatory..we are last one to compete.. so fast man..

like about 3 weeks or less left..

haix..

anyway, this sunday i'm having my singing perf at White Tangerine Cafe.. 8pm-10pm =))

I'll be singing 4 songs.. =D

Do come down to watch if you're free!! ^_^

Dear Diary,

Today I was mad.. haha.. went on a shopping spree... heartache.. cos not working le=no income.. but also happy la.. cos at least the stuffs i bought are really important and useful.. finaly bought myself a new pair of running shoes..=)) after so many months without a proper pair of running shoes.. tmr onwards I'll have more motivation to start my daily running exercise.. =))

Bought a new pair of covered black shoes for work.. helping Mei Hui to work next mon-thurs at Vivo.. so long didnt work as promoter le.. sure stress de lo.. tmr going down for training.. hopefully i'm paid ba.. but most likely like no pay for training.. -.- 5hrs.. have to wear white shirt black pants and covered shoes..

actually didnt really want to work.. cos' especially after this morning's dizi lesson with lao shi.. I suddenly feel that i'm still not up to my own expectations yet.. I know I still have lots of practicing and improvement to work on.. cos I know I can do much better than my current playing.. I feel that though I'm not working right now, there seems to be not much time left.. haix..

And self-image is also very important.. I want to look good on stage.. but with my current figure.. cmi.. haix.. so need to really work on it..

I must really change my bad habit.. *laziness*

shoo shoo..

and my face also.. though lesser pimples recently.. after buying the facial cleasner which I invested quite a lot of money in.. my pimple scars are still stuck on my face.. argh >.<"

thinking of working from mon-thurs next week.. feel a bit sian..and wasted.. though can earn money la.. but then also not much.. have to stand for 8hrs..and dinner time no pay also.. *_*

hopefully the long hours of standing can help me lose some weight.. at least its better than sitting down..

today really tired man.. actually planned to prac dizi today.. cos' i didnt really prac on mon and tues.. felt really uncomfortable about ruining my own plans.. and also planned to either go swimming or running.. cos' lao shi say it will definitely help in boosting my 'Qi'!! but then also in e end didnt.. ended up.. after lesson, went to meet the other boss to help out with his online instrument shop website thingy.. took pics.. but I was so bad at taking the pics.. ended up not really well.. then after that about 6pm le.. i had to buy my shoes for tmr's training.. and etc..

i planned my schedule tmr morning.. to go to the park to run from 7am-8am.. then after that prac dizi for 2-3hrs before going for training from 1pm-6pm.. hai.. i guess it'll take me one whole day again.. at night got to teach mel at 730pm..

i must definitely follow my plan!! pls wake up early tmr, joyce!!

good night~!

Dear Diary,

today went to the positive psychology centre at Concorde Hotel there to know more about their course.. quite interesting.. but fees for the whole course which can last for 9months up to 2yrs is $6000.. so need to reconsider carefully before signing up ba.. hmm...

after that went to Great Eastern Building to meet Weiyan and her agent.. then had a seminar.. Mr Adam Khoo came to give us a 1.5hrs of talk.. the talk was quite inspiring and useful..

i guess perhaps by being an entrepreneur then we'll be able to make lots of money ba..

what he said was quite true.. working for others.. will only give us fix salary.. and also need to see other ppl's face..

he said to earn 1 million dollars is simple but not easy..

successful ppl who earn lots of money does not neccessary be of high qualifications, from rich family or young/old..

they are the ones who are willing to take the risk, go for their goals, take actions, learn from their failures and find other strategies..

he told us.. there are 3 types of ppl in Singapore..

the first one is: work very hard and take action.. but once they fail, they give up.. end up giving excuses in order to avoid the problem..

the second one is: work very hard and take action.. but once they fail, they never give up.. try again and again and again and again.. but they will never be successful.. cos' they keep using back the same old strategy which does not work for them at all.. and ended up being super frustrated and tired.. and lastly- INSANE.. The worst ppl are those who after knowing that something is not right with their strategy, but still keep on using it.. -.-

the last one is: work very hard and take action.. but once they fail, they don't think that they've failed.. but used their failure as a good experience.. so that they know they have used the wrong strategy and then find other strategies until they become successful..

He also said.. everyone wants to be successful but why not everyone becomes successful? the reason is simple.. they don't take action.. only talk and plan but don't action..they have no goals in life..

Perhaps positive thinking is the best solution as this world is full of negative ppl and things.. so guys, if you wanna be rich.. just keep saying this to yourself.. 'I'm going to be rich' and in order for you to be rich, you must love to be rich.. and not curse or swear rich ppl..

so what is my goal for now? hmm..

my interest? passion? goals?

i wonder~~

Dear Diary,

Don't know why.. I have a bad feeling about the group competition.. left exactly 1 more month before our preliminary round.. but our standard is still far away from others.. hai.. need to play tempo 190.. and plus most of it are semi-quavers.. and I couldnt play till the speed.. feel so lousy.. get so excited and nervous when playing that piece.. till everything just went wrong..

i need to buck up le.. i also need to calm down..

wonder if we can get into the finals..

hopefully everyone will jia you ba!!

2 Dec 2008.. last group..out of 7 teams..

1 and only chance..

gambate ne~