J O Y C E.
there's nothing wrong with my name.
I love blogging, well, that's the main reason this URL exists.
She's the only witness and the only person who can judge her life.
This is my blog so Click here if you hate it.

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Designed by Raymond Chua ``-bluezcold ^^- ``Created On 02April2008

Profile

Name: Joyce Poh
School: Singapore Polytechnic
Course: Dip in Music and Audio Technology (Yr3)
Age: 19
DateOfBirth: 27October1988

MY LOVES
DiZi
Performing
MUSIC!
Comedy/Romance Movies
Anime
Swimming
Dreaming
Egg,Ice-cream,chocolate
People who cares
Smiling =)

MY HATES
Unappreciative ppl
Horror Movies
World War/Home War
Making Decisions
Yam, EggPlant and Lady's Fingers

MY WISHES
Peace & Harmony
Know myself & others better
Everyone I care are healthy including myself
Jaw faster heal!!
Happy and more energetic


Thursday, May 1, 2008

life sucks..

Dear Diary,

ha ha ha .. i'm jobless again.. thought tmr still need to go back to work for the boring training.. and i just received a msg saying that my training is over and I dont need to go back.. anyway, i hate the job.. so i'm not sad or disappointed that im not selected... Just feel paiseh for Hazel.. leave you to work alone.. =x

life sucks man.. i just cant seem to find a suitable job i like except teaching dizi.. i love teaching dizi! that's the happiest and most enjoyable time of my life! but sad man.. i only have 1 student so far.. =(

Yesterday's SYCO prac was cool.. xindi only me.. cos pauline didnt come.. finally got to play the whole song cos i've been missing the prac whenever they practised the piece.. the song's really challenging, nice and fun!! ga da mei ling! But sad la.. the xindi solo part is SCO lao shi play de.. so my dream of soloing is gone again.. haix.. btw. i saw GUO LING QIANG LAO SHI on MONDAY!! haha.. his hair looked so different.. he came back and asked us to choose what pieces we wanna play for next yr!! i miss him a lot!! haix.. i hope i dun need to go overseas.. so next yr he come back to conduct us it'll be so fun la!!

hai.. and two days ago I almost went mad.. i was playing solitaire then suddenly heard many voices talking to me inside my head.. so scared.. was on e verge of screaming.. then i immediately shut down my lap top and went to look for my mum.. then relaxed and teared for a while and i was better.. mum even helped me massage my head.. i love her!! haix.. i guessed i was too tired ba.. but this nv happened to me before.. haix.. maybe im really dying soon..

im so damn frustrated nowadays.. especially the scholarship application.. NAC so ma fan.. too late le.. so ended up applying MDA.. but scared by the time reach their office already too late.. cos i sent on 29April.. and 30April was the deadline.. and the online application didnt state clearly.. thought was just online application.. but after I submitted online.. they say mus print out the documents and sign and post it back to their office.. sian.. and NAC worst still.. need referee to write a long essay for me.. and already too late.. cant expect my lecturer to last min rush for me.. not nice.. and think too late also.. then besides that NAC also need to submit our songs and recordings.. haix. give up..

then still waiting for NTU letter.. i really hope i can get in.. though my father keep presurizing me to go overseas.. he keep saying he can afford it but the fact that he cannot.. cos i know.. he is already on so much stress le.. i cant stress him too much!!

today also sucked.. my niece's birthday.. in my mind i was so happy and already planning how everything will work when i pass her the really huge present i bought for her.. the look on her face.. so happy and smiley.. but all just didnt work out the way i expected.. haix..

I spent so much effort and time to choose and buy for her the present.. and i bought it on the day i was on MC and didnt go work.. so sick already but still insisted to buy a present for her.. walked around compass point for hours and finally decided to buy her a doctor play set.. for 3yrs and above.. cos' she's 3 yrs old this yr and can upgrade her toys liao..

I know its ridiculus and childish to be angry with a 3 yr old child for nothing.. but i was really hurt and perhaps emotional ba.. went to her house first thing was to ask 'Where is Rachel?' holding her pink colour wrapped present so happily and when i saw her inside her room with the other kids, I happily and so excitedly wish her 'Happy Birthday!' but then she didnt respond or got excited or anything.. then didnt call me auntie which she would everytime call when she sees me.. then didnt say thank you or what.. worse still, she say she didnt want the present.. wa kao..

then my mood was like sian 1/2 liao.. then went out to eat lunch.. the whole time there was so boring and moody.. nobody cared about us.. like as if my mei and i were like invinsible.. my niece also didnt bother.. then almost quarrelled with my elder sis over the taiwan trip gathering.. she thinks that the group of ppl will do harm to me.. and commands me not to attend their outings or chalet or whatsoever.. but im already a grown up.. i know how to differentiate between good and bad people.. if im uncomfortable with someone, i will stop seeing them.. argh!! so angry.. then when they cut cake really no mood take photo and all.. then when the rest of the people went home, my mei and i took the opportunity to take the present to my niece Rachel.. and asked her to open up the present.. then when she opened up she say she didnt want to play.. she didnt like it.. then her ah ma made the matters worse by saying 'you bring the present back la, she don't like and don't play big toys one'. wtf... i was so angry.. that i really wanted to take the present home!! then was a bit emo again.. and i left.. partly also cos i needed to go teach dizi..

kao.. sian.. next time i don't bother to buy anything for her le.. though i understand she is still young and doesnt know how to think and what is 'being appreciative'.. i understand that i should not be angry over this matter cos' she is still young.. but then im really so hurt.. not angry with my niece of course!! but angry with myself for being like this..!

the only good thing that happened today was teaching dizi.. that's the best and i loved it!! But my father gave me the wet blanket by saying 'are you sure you know how to teach? Dont anyhow teach them.. i see you play like not very good.. etc..' wakao.. #%#^$*$(##@#!!!

today even bought a new pants just for work.. and bought black shoes and a cardigan.. then ended up not selected.. sian man.. waste my money.. the company sucks man.. the boss is so strict and so many many rules.. if late for 1 min need to deduct $20 from your pay.. siao.. then the job got so many things to do.. like as if we are robots.. oh man..i think i cannot do office work.. im also not doing any telemarketings anymore.. i hate it!!! >.<""

think tmr gonna continue calling the konghwa ppl.. hope can finish soon.. its fun calling them.. cos they are already members.. and not strangers who will reject your call.. or scold you and make your day even worse..

10:02:00 PM


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